Self Help

A mild form of flattering others is to give them positive feedback about their statements, actions, and results. Positive feedback might also be considered a confirming behavior because it adds to the self-worth of others. The ability and willingness to give positive feedback contributes to magnetism because people are drawn closer to those people who deliver such feedback. Here are three suggestions for giving positive feedback:

1. Make the feedback specific. Pinpoint what the person did right by saying something on this order: “Your suggestion for using smaller boxes for mailing our products resulted in a $90,000 savings the first year.” Specific feedback is more motivational than a general statement such as “Thanks for the great suggestion.”

2. Provide some of your feedback in public. The most widely accepted adage in human relations is “Criticize in private, praise in public.”

3. Provide the feedback close in time to the good deed. A basic principle of positive reinforcement is that the reward should follow close in time to the behavior that merited the reward. Recognizing that you might have a busy, cramped schedule yourself, set a realistic goal of providing positive feedback (even a one-minute message) within five working days of the good deed you want to recognize.