Self Help

1. Almost Everything Is Negotiable: Before you ever walk in the door, utter a single word to the other side or mail the first letter, your attitude should be that almost everything is negotiable. There is no situation where the circumstances can’t be changed to create a potentially successful negotiation. If a buyer offered a million dollars for that house you said you’d never sell, would you reconsider? No? Two million? Still no? Two million plus stock in the buyer’s company? You get the idea.

Almost no matter what the situation is, you can find a way to bring the other side to the negotiating table. It takes a keen eye, a creative mind, good listening, and sharp questions to elicit the opening you may need to persuade the other side that common ground and mutual interest actually do exist.

2. Predetermine the Tempo of the Negotiation: Before you start, whether you are buying or selling, you should try to look at all the factors that will be coming up in the future that can affect the negotiations. Negotiations are rarely, if ever, concluded in one conversation or one meeting. If you buy a house, or a car, or a company, a series of meetings may be involved.

How often do you want to meet? How much do you want to accomplish at each meeting? Will your schedule allow a quick succession of meetings? Will your opponent’s? You can control the pace if you know your own strong and weak points. You should try to predetermine if it is to your advantage to move quickly or slowly. Moving slowly may force your opponent to adjust his tempo (and perhaps what he wants) if he perceives by your pace that you don’t seem to need his product or service. However, if both sides face the end of a contract and a strike is imminent, you may have to move quickly.

3. Timing: Negotiate when the other side is happy. It may sound elementary to say that there are good and bad times for your opponents to talk business. However, this is another overlooked aspect of negotiating.

A telephone call to offer congratulations can easily turn into a productive business conversation. It is natural for people to feel expansive when things are going well for them. By applauding or sharing in the other person’s success, you may establish a smoother and more amicable relationship than the one you had when the day began. This is a timeless business and social practice.

A good negotiator will also know when it is not the best time to make contact with the other side. If the other person is experiencing the recent loss of a loved one or a disaster in his business, he most probably won’t be in the frame of mind to hear you out, so try to wait until he is in a better position to think about your proposal.